Pity Party

 Last weekend, I got to go to a Dave Matthews concert with my best friend. It was my first concert in nine years and it was incredible. I will post about it but not now. It’s hard to write about a positive experience while feeling down. I’m definitely having my own pity party. 

Yesterday, I told my CNA the details of the last horrible years. Talking brought back a lot of pain. I lost my brother and father a month a part both to suicide. Immediately after came the Covid pandemic. Grieving while social distancing was not easy.  That combined with almost dying and going through a divorce is definitely not how I thought my life would be like.  Sometimes I get really down and upset wondering why this had to happen to me.

Today I was supposed to go riding but thanks to Covid there’s a driver shortage. I had to cancel riding because I can’t find consistent transportation. Another good thing taken away from me.

So I’m having a pity party with the condition that I can’t dwell in my misery. I have learned to cry, to get it out so I can move on. Sorry for such a depressing post but life is not always sunshine and roses.